(no subject)

[conuly]

Dear Amy: My sister-in-law had minor surgery.

I made a few frozen casserole "comfort food" dishes for her and my brother-in-law to consume during her recovery.

Generally, it is acknowledged that I am a good cook.

When I next saw them, they returned one of the casseroles, saying that it is a dish that they don't care for. I know that it is something they eat.

Am I wrong to think it would have been kinder to simply regift the dish, or simply dispose of it, rather than returning it to me?

-- Casserolled

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Carolyn Hax: If you want overprotective parents to trust you, don’t roll your eyes

[conuly]

Dear Carolyn: My brother and sister-in-law had their first baby 18 months ago. She's super cute and I'd love to spend time with her. Except they haven't left her, except for two hours one day last year, AT ALL. No grandparents' babysitting, no date nights, no fun aunt time, etc.

This obviously sounds exhausting and not at all healthy for anyone involved.

So far, I've played into their requests and spend time with her whenever I can, with them. But it's hard to bond with a kid when she knows her better choice is right there hovering over her, and I'm kind of over it. The last straw was asking whether I would watch her at the mall while they got their hair cut. I'm 40, not a 13-year-old kid, I'm not going to watch her at the mall.

Any suggestions on how I can deal with them and have a better attitude so that I can at least see my niece? I had grand ideas of being able to take her for overnights once a year or so, like my aunt did with me starting at 2. At the very least I had grand ideas of being able to babysit her while her parents went out to dinner. My annoyance with my brother and SIL is making me not want to see them at all.

— Annoyed

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