agonyaunt | (no subject)

DEAR ABBY: I am getting married, and my fiance's daughters, 19 and 21, are in the wedding party. I have purchased the dresses they are wearing, which are light and flowing. I have told the girls that on the day of the wedding I do not want them wearing thong underwear. The older one then went to her dad and said she didn't want to wear regular underwear. He told her she could wear whatever she wants. I have tried telling them that as young ladies there are times you don't wear thongs, and under a flowing dress is one of them. It's ONE DAY of their lives. How can I get my point across? -- WISE BRIDE IN PHOENIX

DEAR WISE BRIDE: Explain to your fiance exactly why you are concerned about his daughters wearing thong underwear under their bridesmaid dresses and, when you do, be graphic. After that, if he still feels the same, accept it. Then pray no slip-ups occur while they are dancing, and no strong gusts of wind come along when the wedding photos are taken.

https://www.uexpress.com/life/dearabby/2021/06/17

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Are there any other columnists who would not have used this letter as an excuse to scold, mock, or WTF at the LW? Like, for anyone else with an advice column, "Explain to your fiance exactly why you are concerned about his daughters wearing thong underwear under their bridesmaid dresses and, when you do, be graphic" would be an obvious lead in, a la:

Explain to your fiance exactly why you are concerned about his daughters wearing thong underwear under their bridesmaid dresses and, when you do, be graphic. Write back and let us know how the conversation went! We are all waiting with baited breath for his response as to why his spouse, presumably of a different generation than these young women who are only just of legal age, is so concerned with his daughters' nethers. Were you planning on performing inspections? How do you expect to ensure compliance?