cereta: Barbara Gordon, facepalming (babsoy)
Lucy ([personal profile] cereta) wrote in [community profile] agonyaunt2021-10-08 09:05 am

Dear Abby: Girlfriend Wants Live-In Beau To End His Marriage

DEAR ABBY: I have been with a man for the last six years. He has been separated for 20 years. When I asked him if he was going to finalize his divorce, he said no. When I said I would like a commitment, he said he gave me one when he moved in five years ago. I said I want more. His wife even asked him for a divorce, but he said it's expensive. I told him by my upcoming 50th birthday I want a yes or no on the divorce. What should I do? -- IN LIMBO IN MASSACHUSETTS

DEAR IN LIMBO: Assuming this man lives with you rent-free, you have spent the last six years with a houseguest who is more concerned with his net worth than your need for validation. If his wife wanted a divorce, it would have happened already, and the issue of property division could have been bifurcated (separated). Obviously, this arrangement is serving them both in some way. Your next step should be to make a final decision about whether the status quo is acceptable to you, because it isn't going to change.
ambyr: a dark-winged man standing in a doorway over water; his reflection has white wings (watercolor by Stephanie Pui-Mun Law) (Default)

[personal profile] ambyr 2021-10-08 05:52 pm (UTC)(link)
Right? I might not want to be involved with this guy myself, but he's been very upfront: he's told her he's married and he's told her he's not interested in changing that.
fox: my left eye.  "ceci n'est pas une fox." (Default)

[personal profile] fox 2021-10-08 08:26 pm (UTC)(link)
Exactly. I mean I think the guy is probably a waste of air myself, but one thing he hasn't been is dishonest. What the LW actually means is "by my upcoming 50th birthday I want a different answer about the divorce."