Social Q's: Isn't There a Dog Park Nearby?

[ermingarden]

I moved into an apartment four years ago and was shocked to find that a neighbor runs her dog in our common hallway. Three or four times a day, she throws a ball down the hall, and the dog barks and chases it. It’s extremely noisy. A while ago, she agreed not to do this between noon and 5 p.m. But I’ve been working from home lately, and I’m often interrupted by the noise. I’m averse to contacting building management, but she’s been belligerent about requests to stop playing in the hallway. Advice? –NEIGHBOR

I’m confused. Why have you tolerated this behavior for four years? (And why did you negotiate a “quiet period” that coincided with hours you used to work at an office?) Sometimes, compromise only normalizes bad behavior. Unless there is a compelling explanation for your neighbor’s ridiculous use of your hallway as a dog run, report her to building management tomorrow morning.

Comments

[movingfinger]

I have lived with simmering resentment and a silent, fervent hope that the neighbor who lets their dog gallop around in the hall will just die or move or anything that will remove the dog forever, because if I say something it will be somehow My Fault that the dog is not getting taken outdoors for exercise, the way it was My Fault that the untrained dog barked because it could hear my door.

[cereta]

To be contrary: I am not phobia-level afraid of dogs, but I'm not comfortable around them, and I am often afraid when dogs I don't know, say, run up to my garage as I'm getting out of my car (a kind of appallingly regular thing).

But there's a very strong sentiment in the US that everyone loves dogs and their antics, and it can be really hard to be the one party pooper who says that yeah, actually, I do kind of mind if your dogs are bounding around my front door, because even if they're perfectly friendly, there are things like wet noses (I was once in the house of a friend with two big dogs for five minutes, and my jeans were fucking drenched when I left) and a general anxiety around dogs that has never gone away.

I'm not saying your neighbors aren't perfectly cool with the situation. I'm just cautioning others that someone saying, "Oh, sure, it's fine" may be feeling pressure not to be labeled a no-fun dog-hater.

[ysobel]

Honestly, even as a dog person I ... dislike ... the fervent EVERYONE MUST LOVE MY DOG type owners.

I think Yahtzee (my service dog) is hella awesome but I don't need to force him on people (except inasmuch as using a service dog is public exposure), and I utterly respect that some people just aren't dog people.

(I also send a note, any time I order delivery, that I have a big black dog, so they aren't caught off-guard. Just because I know he's trained and friendly doesn't mean they do, and anyway trained-and-friendly doesn't help phobias / anxiety / dislike / allergy / balance issues / whatever.)

[cereta]

Sorry, that post should have been a reply to the one above yours.