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Carolyn Hax: If your shiftless fiance won’t take out the trash, put him on the curb
Adapted from an online discussion.
Dear Carolyn: I love my fiance and until recently thought we had a wonderful partnership. We've lived together for eight years and he makes more money and works longer hours, so I do almost all the housework. He's not only kind and thoughtful but always seemed appreciative of the work I do around the house.
Recently I was hospitalized for two weeks. When I came home I found he had never once walked our dog — just let the poor thing out into our tiny yard, and he didn't clean up. The house was an absolute wreck, he didn't cook or clean anything, left pizza boxes stacked on the counter, and dirty laundry piled on the laundry room floor. I was still recovering and that was kind of a nightmare to come home to.
I asked him why he didn't do anything, and he said he's no good at that stuff and knew I'd want to do it "the right way" when I got back.
We moved in together right out of college so he's never taken care of a place by himself. I asked him if he wanted to learn, but he said he doesn't see a real problem with the shape the house was in. Would you consider this a big enough issue to delay our summer wedding?
— Still in Shock
Still in Shock: Uhhh, yes?
Yes, I would consider it a big enough issue that you’re looking at 100 percent housework for the rest of your life with this man and, worse, his utter comfort with your exerting yourself on your mutual behalf while he does nothing, believing . . . can you hear my print voice rising as I type? . . . it’s a favor to YOU that he does! Right out of your sickbed!
And the poor dog, suffering such neglect. Is it one of those dogs that likes the poop scooped in a certain way that your fiance just isn’t good at?
I was actually leaning sympathetic to the guy at the start, expecting him to have been under duress with you in the hospital and with maybe too much going on at work — and certainly that will stress a partner out significantly. It’s hard to do housework when you’re wearing a groove between your office and a loved one’s hospital room. But “he’s no good at that stuff and knew I’d want to do it ‘the right way’ when I got back”??? A person actually said that!? To a loved one who’s been sick?!
https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/advice/carolyn-hax-if-your-shiftless-fiance-wont-take-out-the-trash-put-him-on-the-curb/2019/11/11/c44263a2-0264-11ea-8501-2a7123a38c58_story.html
Dear Carolyn: I love my fiance and until recently thought we had a wonderful partnership. We've lived together for eight years and he makes more money and works longer hours, so I do almost all the housework. He's not only kind and thoughtful but always seemed appreciative of the work I do around the house.
Recently I was hospitalized for two weeks. When I came home I found he had never once walked our dog — just let the poor thing out into our tiny yard, and he didn't clean up. The house was an absolute wreck, he didn't cook or clean anything, left pizza boxes stacked on the counter, and dirty laundry piled on the laundry room floor. I was still recovering and that was kind of a nightmare to come home to.
I asked him why he didn't do anything, and he said he's no good at that stuff and knew I'd want to do it "the right way" when I got back.
We moved in together right out of college so he's never taken care of a place by himself. I asked him if he wanted to learn, but he said he doesn't see a real problem with the shape the house was in. Would you consider this a big enough issue to delay our summer wedding?
— Still in Shock
Still in Shock: Uhhh, yes?
Yes, I would consider it a big enough issue that you’re looking at 100 percent housework for the rest of your life with this man and, worse, his utter comfort with your exerting yourself on your mutual behalf while he does nothing, believing . . . can you hear my print voice rising as I type? . . . it’s a favor to YOU that he does! Right out of your sickbed!
And the poor dog, suffering such neglect. Is it one of those dogs that likes the poop scooped in a certain way that your fiance just isn’t good at?
I was actually leaning sympathetic to the guy at the start, expecting him to have been under duress with you in the hospital and with maybe too much going on at work — and certainly that will stress a partner out significantly. It’s hard to do housework when you’re wearing a groove between your office and a loved one’s hospital room. But “he’s no good at that stuff and knew I’d want to do it ‘the right way’ when I got back”??? A person actually said that!? To a loved one who’s been sick?!
https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/advice/carolyn-hax-if-your-shiftless-fiance-wont-take-out-the-trash-put-him-on-the-curb/2019/11/11/c44263a2-0264-11ea-8501-2a7123a38c58_story.html
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1. fold in half longwise
2. nest the corners together from each long side - I do this by sticking the corners of the top edge one on each hand, and then wrestle the bottom edge on top.
3. bring the corners together, so that your hands touch through four layers of fabric
4. flip one pair of corners on top of the other pair. The top of the sheet should now be four layers thick, and with a bit of shaking (and maybe grabbing the fold diagonal from the corner you are holding) should sit flat
4. Ignoring the short edge, straighten the long edge so that the skirt of the sheet is sitting flat against the big folded section
5. tidy up the corner so that the short section is also sitting flat. Think of it as folding paper for gift wrapping, if that helps.
At this point, you have something that is sufficiently rectangular that you can fold as if it is. Fold 'inwards' so that the elasticated edges are tucked in to the middle. This is the bit where you have to work out what fits on your shelf, and fudge a bit.
As an extra - I find this easiest to do when taking them off the line, as it enables me to get a good grip on the first two corners. I have no idea how one does it if one is using a dryer.
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