Dear Abby: Unhappy Grandma Gets an Eyeful of Son-in-Law Wearing Skivvies

[lilysea]

Dear Abby,

After my future son-in-law moved in with our daughter, my husband and I stopped by unannounced to visit. He answered the door in his underwear and never bothered to go put on a pair of shorts. We didn't say anything and, of course, didn't stay long.

It was close to Christmas, so we bought him a robe and my husband jokingly told him, "We figured you didn't have one since you stay in your underwear when we're here." Even after that, he still does it.

I finally told my daughter, "Since he can't take a hint, please tell him to put on clothes when I'm coming over." Since then, when we've stopped by (dropping off the grandbabies) he still doesn't put shorts on.

It happened again today. I asked him to please throw on some shorts, and his response was, "You're killing me in my own house," but he did do it. They rely on us to help with our granddaughters, but I'm fed up with having to see him in his underwear. I also don't think he should go around that way around his 6-year-old stepdaughter and his 2-month-old daughter. What are your thoughts on this? -- HURTING EYES IN FLORIDA

DEAR HURTING EYES: Because you are doing your daughter and her husband the favor of looking after the grandkids, and you have let them know you prefer not seeing your son-in-law in his undies, your wishes should be respected. However, different families have different standards regarding attire around the house, and you shouldn't judge him for what he chooses to wear in the privacy of his home when you are not around.

Comments

[ellen_fremedon]

Is it possible that LW tends to overstay her welcome, and the wearing undies is a way to make sure that she actually LEAVES?

The first time this happened, she says she'd stopped by unannounced--I'm betting the son-in-law didn't get dressed that time to discourage her from coming in at all. But not only did she not take the hint, she bought him a bathrobe and kept twitting him about it. So now it's become a thing where he's not going to get dressed because that would be admitting she had had the right to come over uninvited and still expect his full hospitality.

[jadelennox]

When my mother moved closer to me, I flat out told her that if she dropped by unannounced ever, she might not like what she saw. And she never has.