Dear Prudence: My New Cat Is Stolen Property!

[minoanmiss]

I think I’m … going to keep it?



Dear Prudence,

My sister recently gave me a cat. She claims it was a stray, but I found out it belonged to her neglectful housemate. She was not feeding or cleaning up after the kitty and leaving it to everyone else. My sister got fed up when her housemate took a spur of the moment Caribbean vacation with her boyfriend and didn’t leave food or litter behind or even any money. She later confessed that she lied and told her housemate the cat escaped. She showed me a clip of this girl hysterically crying about her cat. My sister found it funny and turned defensive when I said that it was pretty cruel of her. She says it is cruel to get a pet and then purposely not take care of it. The girl was treating a living animal like a toy to be put up on a shelf as she pleased. I know my sister was fed up with having to be responsible for a pet she didn’t even want, but I guess her behavior just rubs me the wrong way. Do I say anything to my sister? And for the record, I am keeping the cat.

—About the Cat

Dear About the Cat,

Don’t say a word. If you’re keeping it, you’re complicit in the catnapping—which, by the way, I think was wrong! Your sister should have expressed her concern by caring for the poor animal, not by stealing and rehoming it. As things stand, you don’t have room to say anything at all.

Comments

[ashbet]

The sister sounds like a piece of work, but I think the cat is probably better off with the letter writer.

[oursin]

But WHY should sister express her concern by caring for the cat, which was
a pet she didn’t even want?
Okay, had she remonstrated with housemate? (probably) She cried hysterically when she thought it had escaped, but would she actually care for it properly if SURPRISE! it came back? (Deeply cynical here.)

[azurelunatic]

And since the neglectful housemate had been leaving cat care "to everyone else", I would bet sister had already been caring for the cat.

[dissectionist]

Team LW. The cat could have died when Neglectful Owner took off (what if LW’s sister had an emergency and had to leave?), and when you do that to an animal, you lose any ethical rights to have one. It’s not LW’s sister’s responsibility to have to take over care for an animal they had no part in acquiring, all so that Neglectful Owner can have the benefits of a pet with no responsibility.

[matsushima]

Taking the cat from the neglectful roommate was the right thing to do but LW is right that mocking her for being upset when it "escaped" is also kind of mean.

[tielan]

I am Team Cat.

Keep the cat. Never speak of how it was stolen. Love it and cherish it and hope the sister's housemate never discovers what happened...

[conuly]

The catnapping was not wrong, wtf Prudence.

[sushiflop]

TBH I have very little sympathy for someone who gets an animal just to neglect it and offload the costs and responsibilities on the people around them that didn't opt into the pet. The main thing that makes me feel this isn't great is that nothing is stopping housemate from getting another cat and repeating the process.

[kiezh]

She lied to you about the cat being a stray. She lied to the housemate about the cat escaping. She *filmed her housemate crying* in order to laugh at it later.

Sure, keep the cat if you think it's safer with you. (Though if I were you, I'd make sure I had a source on that other than Ms. Habitual Liar.)

You have a sister problem. She's a giant creep. Yes, tell her so. And look for corroborating or contradictory evidence on everything she tells you. (Also keep an eye out for her phone if she's around when you're upset! Good god, is this really so normalized now??? LW, you need your "normal" recalibrated. Your sister treated a living human being like a toy for entertainment. Apparently she thinks it's only wrong to do it to cats, not humans?)