![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
Another letter I hope is fake
I have a seven-year-old son who’s extremely sensitive to certain smells and foods. It’s been quite challenging navigating his needs. The other day at the playground, I found myself in an awkward situation with another mother. I know that her daughter’s lunch had a strong smell that has been bothering my son, so I decided to mention it, even though I felt awkward doing so. I tried to explain how these odors were disrupting his school day and affecting his appetite. I approached her politely, hoping for some understanding. However, she completely dismissed my concerns and suggested that my son could just move away if he didn’t like it. I was taken aback; it felt like she didn’t care about my son’s well-being at all.
My husband thinks I could have handled it better, but I’m not sure what else I could have done. I was just trying to advocate for my son. His sensitivity to smells and foods is already such a challenge, and these strong odors are making his school days unbearable. He shouldn’t have to suffer because this other mother packs food that is not appropriate for a child’s school lunch. I approached the other mother calmly, hoping she might change her mind out of common decency. Instead, she refused to consider any changes; she even resorted to profane language.
I hate seeing my son struggle like this. I refuse to let him dread school lunches because of someone else’s insensitivity. What else can I do to get the other mother to comply with my request? I’m open to any and all suggestions, even if I have to go over her head or pursue legal options. I know it may sound drastic, but my child’s welfare is at stake, and I need somebody aside from me to take this situation seriously.
—One Angry Mama Bear
Dear Mama Bear,
I can imagine how difficult it must be for you to watch your son struggle with his sensitivity, but that’s not reason enough for another parent to change what they send their child for lunch. It’s one thing if we’re talking about a play date, but it’s not fair to expect other children to adapt what they eat just because he’s in the vicinity. You don’t know what sort of food-related issues the other kids may be dealing with that may require them to eat foods you consider odorous. You don’t say what this food was, but it’s also worth considering that so-called “ethnic” food is often pungent, leading kids who bring it to school to be teased about it. It would be culturally insensitive to suggest that they start bringing other dishes.
Is there perhaps a scent that your son can smell when he’s triggered by something unpleasant, like an essential oil that he can carry in his backpack. You should talk to your son’s teacher and perhaps principal about making adequate accommodations for him; unfortunately, that may have to entail him sitting by himself. It may suck, but if that’s the only way you can avoid him dealing with uncomfortable smells, then it’s necessary. Perhaps he can have an assigned seat in the cafeteria where other kids have to maintain their distance, or maybe he can eat by himself in a classroom. Sorry to say, but there isn’t much else you can do. I realize that many classrooms have gone nut free to accommodate student allergies, but a sensitivity to smell is much more subjective and difficult to plan around. The specific smells that repulse your child may be carried by the foods his classmates need to survive.
Link
My husband thinks I could have handled it better, but I’m not sure what else I could have done. I was just trying to advocate for my son. His sensitivity to smells and foods is already such a challenge, and these strong odors are making his school days unbearable. He shouldn’t have to suffer because this other mother packs food that is not appropriate for a child’s school lunch. I approached the other mother calmly, hoping she might change her mind out of common decency. Instead, she refused to consider any changes; she even resorted to profane language.
I hate seeing my son struggle like this. I refuse to let him dread school lunches because of someone else’s insensitivity. What else can I do to get the other mother to comply with my request? I’m open to any and all suggestions, even if I have to go over her head or pursue legal options. I know it may sound drastic, but my child’s welfare is at stake, and I need somebody aside from me to take this situation seriously.
—One Angry Mama Bear
Dear Mama Bear,
I can imagine how difficult it must be for you to watch your son struggle with his sensitivity, but that’s not reason enough for another parent to change what they send their child for lunch. It’s one thing if we’re talking about a play date, but it’s not fair to expect other children to adapt what they eat just because he’s in the vicinity. You don’t know what sort of food-related issues the other kids may be dealing with that may require them to eat foods you consider odorous. You don’t say what this food was, but it’s also worth considering that so-called “ethnic” food is often pungent, leading kids who bring it to school to be teased about it. It would be culturally insensitive to suggest that they start bringing other dishes.
Is there perhaps a scent that your son can smell when he’s triggered by something unpleasant, like an essential oil that he can carry in his backpack. You should talk to your son’s teacher and perhaps principal about making adequate accommodations for him; unfortunately, that may have to entail him sitting by himself. It may suck, but if that’s the only way you can avoid him dealing with uncomfortable smells, then it’s necessary. Perhaps he can have an assigned seat in the cafeteria where other kids have to maintain their distance, or maybe he can eat by himself in a classroom. Sorry to say, but there isn’t much else you can do. I realize that many classrooms have gone nut free to accommodate student allergies, but a sensitivity to smell is much more subjective and difficult to plan around. The specific smells that repulse your child may be carried by the foods his classmates need to survive.
Link
no subject
no subject