not helpful but I cackled

[ysobel]

Dear Miss Manners: My 10-year-old grandson decided to have his stuffed animals — a raccoon, a monkey, a bunny rabbit and an octopus — “spy” on me. They are put in places where they can “watch” me. (I should add that the animals do not have any embedded cameras or recording equipment.)

My wife of 40 years goes along with this. I put the animals away, but she brings them back, maybe even hiding them better.

I have never seen this issue addressed before. How do I get my grandson and wife to stop having these animals spy on me? I am 67 years old, a retired attorney and a minister. I do not need watching!

MM: The monkey says otherwise.

[link]

Comments

[castiron]

I'd rather have Octopus on the Bookcase than Elf on the Shelf.

[minoanmiss]

Bwee

[green_grrl]

+1
I mean, I assume that’s where kid picked it up from. And I admit I do find EotS creepy.

[dissectionist]

LW does mention he was a reverend, which strongly suggests his family would have been raised with heavy religion. “God/Jesus is always watching” was a thing long before EotS, so the kid may well have gotten his pro-surveillance stance from that.

[melannen]

Yeah, if you actually feel the need to do something about this, talk to the parents about why they traumatized him with Elf on the Shelf....

[watersword]

Man, some people just do not have a sense of humor.

[conuly]

What concerns me is that this ten year old only has four stuffed animals.

[azurelunatic]

I'm guessing that LW may not have bothered to enumerate any of the possible other stuffed animals who aren't on surveillance duty. My stuffed lamb wouldn't have been any good at staking out anywhere, but my stuffed cat could lurk all day without getting tired.

[conuly]

Fair.

[naath]

I assume only these are 'on duty', I know I have too many to enumerate. Also, let the kid play

[conuly]

Also, let the kid play

Hey, this is serious business! So serious, we don't have time for vowels! Srs bsns.

[naath]

vry srs

[cereta]

Zing!

Also, dude: you have a year, maybe two, before your grandson becomes far too cool to give you this kind of attention. Enjoy it while it lasts!

[jadelennox]

LOL

[dissectionist]

Aw, that’s cute. Play along with the kid while you can; that stage will be over real quick. I’d suggest getting your own stuffed animal to run surveillance on the kid and then making up fantastical stories together about what the animals saw the other person do. <3

[cimorene]

Put clothes or accessories on it and say you've subverted it and it's a double agent and has been telling him exactly what you wanted him to hear the whole time.

[dissectionist]

Right? Be silly and play along. Those times will be treasured memories later if adults don’t squash the kids’ play. I’m glad at least Grandma is on it.

[mrissa]

He's lucky, my stuffed raccoon had nothing like the kind of focus required for spy work.

At least the kid has a minimum of one fun grandparent, sheesh.

[cassildra]

In seriousness though, I kinda wonder if he's hiding something and this is a guilt response. It's so wildly disproportionate otherwise, y'know?

[dissectionist]

Some people are dour by nature and have fragile egos. If he’s feeling insulted by the idea that someone else thinks he needs to be spied on (rather than seeing the fun silliness in it), he could be one of those people.

[melannen]

I can see it being a reasonable complaint? Like still not necessarily a valid one, but reasonable. If he's a minister it's likely he's doing a fair amount of wfh, possibly sometimes involving difficult and confidential pastoral counseling work. I would not like a stuffed monkey "spying" on me while trying to figure out how to help a parishioner with their sexuality crisis either! Like either it's being bothered for no reason, in which case it's reasonable to find it annoying while he's working, or it's worth playing along with - in which case, it's reasonable to not want to be spied on at work. It also may come off as (or actually be) part of a pattern of them constantly picking at him for not paying attention to them while he's doing ministerial work.

If it is something like "I work from home and this is making it hard for me to concentrate/feels inappropriate for my workspace" the solution is probably to have a serious talk with both wife & kid about sectioning off a separate space for work, with no stuffed animal spies, in exchange for being less grumpy about it otherwise. With a talk about the importance of confidentiality in your work and/or an offer to hire just one on officially as an assistant with a background check and NDA.

[minoanmiss]

Hiring the grandchild or one of the stuffed animals? Either way I look forward to the background check.

[melannen]

Oh I meant one of the stuffed animals! Hiring the grandkid would definitely *not* solve the Being Bothered At Work Issue. But if Octopus wants to submit a job application, have a background interview, and sign an NDA/confidentiality agreement, he'd probably be significantly less disconcerting sitting in his own office area with his notepad than lurking behind the potted plant, and Grandkid would still have a presence in Grandpa's office (and Octopus might actually be helpful with some of the counseling work!)

[minoanmiss]

splorfle BRilliant.

[dissectionist]

I love this solution because it’s both playing along *and* creating a healthy compromise.

[cereta]

Okay, that is so adorable I am sorry my child never had her Barbies spying on me.

[katiedid717]

LW should just be glad that his grandson isn't doing what I did when I was 10 - I would hide my uncle's belongings in his apartment and then have him pay me to be a detective and find them. Like seriously dude, lighten up.