(no subject)

[conuly]

Dear Prudence,

I’ve always been sensitive to the spirits of the dead. My mom told me that when I was little I used to “play” with my deceased grandfather, I often know things that I have no other way of knowing, and generally, I can just sense a presence sometimes. Except for a few terrible childhood field trips to battlefields, I’ve always found it comforting—most spirits are gentle and not all that interested in people they didn’t know in life, and I enjoy the fact that even when I’m alone, I’m not really alone.

A few months ago my dad passed away (my mom passed years ago). I inherited my parent’s house, and my husband and I decided to move in and grow our family to fill the space. The thing is, my parents won’t leave me alone! Recently, my husband and I were in our bedroom working on “growing our family” and I sensed my dad, which ruined the mood. My mom definitely disapproves of the fact that I tore down her dining room wallpaper. And they both showed up in the middle of a petty argument we had, and took sides! I did not sign up for moving back in with my parents.

I know from experience that the dead don’t take orders from the living, and I really like the idea of my children growing up in a house infused with their grandparents’ spirits, so I need to get over this. How can I get used to having my parents hovering over my shoulder all the time?

—Never Alone

Dear Never Alone,

Far be it from me to suggest that your parents’ spirits aren’t hanging around. I will take your word for it, and go with what people who sincerely believe in this kind of paranormal activity would suggest: Say, “By the power of all my good karma, direct connection to Source, agape love, and selfless acts, I ask the universe to please remove all negative entities from this house. You are not welcome here, so please go back to where you came from.” Since you know these people, you can preface that with “Sorry mom and dad, but…”

https://slate.com/human-interest/2022/10/spirits-haunting-dear-prudence-advice.html

Comments

[ashbet]

Maybe it’s because I’m Pagan — the New Agey mishmash of “good karma, direct connection to Source, agape love, and selfless acts” feels a bit gross and appropriative (not going to go so far as to call it cultural/religious appropriation, but that’s terms from three different belief systems + “selfless acts”), thrown together to sound like a spell/banishment ritual.

It feels like mockery of the LW, *especially* since they explicitly stated that their goal was to achieve peace with the presence of their parents’ spirits around them and their children, not to have a made-up exorcism.

I feel like therapy, with a professional who is open to alternative spiritual practices and beliefs, would be a better solution.

Salt and crystals may be comforting in terms of setting visible barriers in private space, but what the LW needs most is the ability to draw boundaries around their privacy and comfort while going about ordinary life in their home and inside their mind.

[melannen]

I mean, to me it sounded pretty much like what a sincere-but-no-specific-path New Age person would say? Pulling together things from a bunch of different systems in a mishmashy way is kind of how that works. I kind of assumed Pru had gone to a friend who has those beliefs for that part because it mostly just sounded authentic, to me.

But I agree with you on how it was a greatly inappropriate answer to the actual question, I think Pru got too excited about being clever about parents as evil spirits to actually read the letter or listen to LW, and that came off as callous as best even if it wasn't meant as mockery.