Yeah, many times I think it is true that your gut says it is something and it really is. And dead naming someone is definitely transphobia and also just plain harassment. But the things that stops me from saying this is transphobia is every person I know with a longer or even say, a older style name finds that people want to shorten them. That isn't to say that folks aren't also being transphobic and harassing them in other ways.. I just feel like any name that can be shortened ends up getting shortened by someone and if you don't like it? you have to speak up for yourself bc lots of other people just don't care as much.

Granted it goes the other way as well. My aunt's name is Judy. Legal name. Judy. She knows it isn't someone who knows her when they ask for Judith. She tells them Judith isn't here and she ignores them. I have had a similar experience. Teachers called me "Tony" and then when they wanted my attention would call me "Antonia" and that wasn't my name or even the cutened version and I wouldn't reply bc I really would not hear it.

Maybe that is another answer for LW. Stop responding to it? like if someone calls out for you and they aren't using the name you want just don't respond? the harder part is Jo was their name for awhile and they already respond to it.