Part-time Professor's Students Show Insufficient Deference

[conuly]

DEAR MISS MANNERS: As a part-time university professor, I have of late been receiving emails from students who use the closing salutations "Best" and "Best regards." A bit of research reveals that many websites do recommend use of these terms by students.

Personally, I find these closings to be far too personal. They actually rankle me.

One way to find alternatives to such terms is to examine advice on writing to judges. After all, we as professors are, in effect, judging students' mastery of a subject and assigning them a grade. You'd never sign a letter or an email to a judge using "Best" or "Best regards," or even "Regards."

One would use "Respectfully," or similar terms. I find "Respectfully" or "Respectfully yours" far preferable to "Best," "All the best" or some such when writing to a professor.

Moreover, a simple "Thank you" at the end of an email in which a student is asking for a meeting, or to revisit an assignment, etc., seems quite sufficient to me, and does not verge across the line into overfamiliarity. What do you think?

GENTLE READER: It is true that "I remain your humble and obedient servant" was a bit cumbersome, and perhaps odd when writing to challenge the recipient to a duel.

Even among the few of us who have stayed with the more dignified "Sincerely yours" and "Yours truly" -- of whom even fewer know that the first is for social correspondence and the second for business -- the "yours" is often dropped from "sincerely."

Miss Manners is always cautioning people not to take such conventions literally, as have those who substitute the cheeky "Hi!" to avoid addressing the unloved as "dear." "Regards," which avoids protesting one's sincerity or truthfulness, is perhaps a bit breezy for a superior, but she would not want to invite arguments about the amount of respect felt toward individual professors.

Still, she can't help thinking "Best what?" when that word appears alone. Would it wear out those senders to add one more word?

But your request for thanks is premature. The writer can express appreciation, but only in the conditional tense -- "I would be very grateful if you would ..." -- in case you do not comply.

https://www.uexpress.com/life/miss-manners/2021/10/04

Comments

[conuly]

You know, it's almost nice to know that in this world of stalkers and COVID there are still some people out there with nothing better to do than to gripe to Miss Manners about their students' closing salutations.

FFS, LW even googled it, saw that their students are just copying widespread email-writing advice, and is still whining about it.

[perspi]

As a full-time university professor: What the fuck?

I'm lucky to get students actually addressing me as "Dr." or "Professor" in their emails (as opposed to "Mrs.", or just using my last name, or, you know, just starting in without a greeting at all). I don't have the mental energy to worry that they end their emails appropriately respectfully.

And apparently I'm hella disrespectful when I end emails with "Best." Huh.

[cereta]

Seriously. I've had that problem since I became a "Dr." and "Prof.," no matter how many times and how many ways I tell them. I don't even really object to "Ms," but "Mrs. Lastname" not only irks me, but it's inaccurate. Yes, I'm married, but I didn't change my last name. One semester, I had a student who just called me "Mrs." Not "Mrs. Name." Just "Mrs." Not only did he ignore my weekly corrections, he never bothered to learn my name. I finally just kicked him out of class one day. At that point, he just stopped addressing me as anything.

[frenzy]

I sign all my work emails as "kind regards". Wow. I kind of hope im ruffling some boomer's feathers tbh.

[conuly]

If that's your goal then be sure to always say "No problem" in response to "Thank you". There are some people who really get unreasonably het up about that, and I just don't know why.

[beable]

No worries!

[azurelunatic]

Cheers, mate!

[perspi]

AHAHA YES

[lilysea]

I used to sign my workplace emails "Kind regards"

and a friend who worked in a similar workplace said

"Wow, that's overly formal!"

Context: Australian public service

[cereta]

Seriously. I don't even use a sign-off phrase for workplace communication, unless you count "Thanks!" in the last line of the body. If it's an email to someone outside the institution (and even then only in very, very formal circumstances), I might use "Sincerely," but to colleagues and students? Hells, in replies, I don't even always put my name, unless you count my sig.

[green_grrl]

Right? “Best regards” is my fancy sign off!

[fred_mouse]

Which makes you a whole word more polite than I, who has reached the point of 'Regards,'

[needles]

Is this man a time traveler or a Hamilton fanboy or something? How in the hell is "best regards" too personal?

Also lol @ comparing himself to a judge. Dude, you're judging whether I know 2+2 is 4 not whether I go to prison and have a criminal record that has long reaching effects on my life. Get over yourself.

[cereta]

You know, I had pictured LW as a woman, but now that you mention it, I bet it's a dude, and a white dude at that. Women professors have way more disrespectful email behavior to gripe about than this.

[troisoiseaux]

Maybe I'm just a spoiled zillennial, but... I thought "regards" (whether best, kind, etc.) was pretty formal?

I tend to use "thank you" (formal) or "thanks!" (informal) as my email sign-offs, anyway.

[green_grrl]

I’m a(n old) Gen-Xer, and I categorize these sign-offs exactly the same way.

[lunabee34]

OMG

Please do not ever let me have to sit on a committee with this jackass.

I thought this was going to be about students using the professor's first name, not whatever fresh hell this is.

I have to go eat a popsicle or something now. I cannot imagine in these trying times that this is the student behavior that would worry me.

[heavenscalyx]

This guy needs to sit down and shut up. His students are using standard corporate communication styles. He's no better than someone's manager, who is often lucky to get a "Hi!" at the beginning and "Thanks!" at the end.

[beable]

OMG, I remember "Sincerely yours" and "Yours truly" from writing letters as a kid and it would never have occurred to me that "yours truly" is the less personal "more businesslike" of them!

Mind you , writing letters as a kid I was a huge fan of all the yours witticisms that probably all 10 year olds thougt were hil-arious

yours till Niagara Falls
yours till the kitchen sinks
yours till the door jams
yours till the fruit flies

[petra]

With you all the way on yours till Niagara Falls.

[edenfalling]

I sign all my professional business emails with "Best regards" and have done so for years. Not one single person has ever complained!

Honestly, I open a lot of them with "Hi Firstname" as well -- at least after the initial exchange, which rates a "Dear Whomever" on account of first impressions and whatnot.

This person needs to get over themself, stat.

[torachan]

This whole thing is just ridiculous, but why on earth would he think any of his students would have experience writing to judges (I don't think many people have that experience?) and thus could use that as a comparison.

[ioplokon]

I think 'Best,' is now neutral in most business emails in my area so LW is fighting a losing battle there.