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My Sister’s Husband Is Agreeing to Things No Straight Man Would. It’s a Sign.
Dear How to Do It,
I’m an 18-year-old guy, and I’ve recently had to move in with my older sister and her husband. My brother-in-law, “Kenneth,” is honestly the most amazing guy I’ve ever met. He’s kind, funny, and built like a Greek god. He’s also super traditional and religious, which is part of why I’m so confused.
Lately, I feel like there’s this insane sexual tension between us. He walks around the house in just sweatpants with no underwear, and the bulge is so obvious. I feel like he has to know what he’s doing. Today, he was working out shirtless, and I asked if I could just sit and watch. He said yes, no questions asked, and worked out for a full hour. He was lifting weights and flexing right in front of me.
To me, this is a clear sign. A straight guy wouldn’t let another guy just watch him work out, would he? He has to be into it. But he’s also my sister’s husband, and he’s super religious, so it’s all so complicated. I’m starting to think about ways to make a move, to show him I’m interested. I’m convinced he wants it too. My question is: Am I right? Is he giving me signals, or am I imagining this?
—Confused and Craving
Dear Confused and Craving,
Even if the husband of your sister, who you have been given shelter by, is interested in having sex with you and is giving you signals, you absolutely should not encourage this. Sex with your brother-in-law is a breach of your sister’s trust. It’s also nearly guaranteed to screw up your living situation.
Those two reasons are more than enough to pass on this scenario. Stop looking when Kenneth is working out, flaunting his bulge, or otherwise feels like he’s flirting with you. Disengage and put your amorous efforts somewhere more appropriate.
—Jessica
Link
I’m an 18-year-old guy, and I’ve recently had to move in with my older sister and her husband. My brother-in-law, “Kenneth,” is honestly the most amazing guy I’ve ever met. He’s kind, funny, and built like a Greek god. He’s also super traditional and religious, which is part of why I’m so confused.
Lately, I feel like there’s this insane sexual tension between us. He walks around the house in just sweatpants with no underwear, and the bulge is so obvious. I feel like he has to know what he’s doing. Today, he was working out shirtless, and I asked if I could just sit and watch. He said yes, no questions asked, and worked out for a full hour. He was lifting weights and flexing right in front of me.
To me, this is a clear sign. A straight guy wouldn’t let another guy just watch him work out, would he? He has to be into it. But he’s also my sister’s husband, and he’s super religious, so it’s all so complicated. I’m starting to think about ways to make a move, to show him I’m interested. I’m convinced he wants it too. My question is: Am I right? Is he giving me signals, or am I imagining this?
—Confused and Craving
Dear Confused and Craving,
Even if the husband of your sister, who you have been given shelter by, is interested in having sex with you and is giving you signals, you absolutely should not encourage this. Sex with your brother-in-law is a breach of your sister’s trust. It’s also nearly guaranteed to screw up your living situation.
Those two reasons are more than enough to pass on this scenario. Stop looking when Kenneth is working out, flaunting his bulge, or otherwise feels like he’s flirting with you. Disengage and put your amorous efforts somewhere more appropriate.
—Jessica
Link
Dear gay penthouse letters, I never thought this would happen to me....
1. LW is too young and dumb to understand the repercussions of blowing up his sister's marriage like this
2. LW is too young and dumb to understand the repercussions of blowing up his living situation like this
3. LW does not remotely have enough life experience to know what "no straight man would do". I'm pretty sure that the list of things no straight man would do except under extreme duress is a lot shorter than LW's limited experience would suggest.
4. LW needs to stop thinking with his dick, but this, too, likely is a function of his immaturity more than anything else
Re: Dear gay penthouse letters, I never thought this would happen to me....
Re: Dear gay penthouse letters, I never thought this would happen to me....
Re: Dear gay penthouse letters, I never thought this would happen to me....
eighteen is absolutely the right age to be this dumb and hormone addled. god knows i was this stupid back then.
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>so it’s all so complicated.
No, it's not. He's your sisters husband. It's only complicated if you hate your sister and want to be homeless.
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This is what I would assume! I just assume all buff straight dudes want to show off their workout technique to younger straight dudes. It's a manly hetero thing!
Agree with the commenter who said the guy is treating LW like a kid brother.
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In real life
a) he's not flirting with you, he's the kind of straight man to whom it doesn't even occur that someone might take his actions as flirting
b) even if he WAS flirting with you (which I am 99.99% certain he's not) is it really worth destroying your relationship with your sister and losing your housing?
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becomes all 'Coocoocachoo MRS ROBINSON she totally fancies me'.
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