Try worrying more about her feelings than about your hopes and dreams for a child you haven't even met yet and probably won't be anything like you're expecting anyway.

And consider further: your in-laws apparently had a little script for how their family was supposed to be, to which your wife failed to conform.

If you don’t get the kind of child you scripted (and it looks as if you’re already doing so), will you repeat the pattern? And how will your wife (not to mention your child) receive that?