Interesting point. And might, perhaps, be part of his frustration - it's pretty common, though not fair/reasonable, to be even more annoyed by people who share your issues (or have a more severe version) and aren't able to handle them like you've managed to.

And sorry, OP, but he's not being a great, or even good, dad right now - I hope he can get over the defensiveness. And stop touching her in ways she hates jfc