Plus it takes a certain amount of somatic awareness and ability to self-advocate to be able to articulate things like a specific low-level amount of discomfort, especially in an already fraught situation.

I'm thinking about my "I don't like this" to any number of things in childhood that turned out to be things like food intolerances. And even a good parent may go "stop whining, they fit, we need to finish shopping" at some points, and a parent who is bad in the specific way this one is? yeah. no.