"if you don't want to deal with a child's needs, don't have the child in the first place" isn't the thing people are responding to this way. It's the completely off-the-wall extremist nonsense that Conuly quoted, for example. You repeatedly playing "why oh why are people acting like [reasonable position] is such a problem" on the hurdygurdy is not very convincing when you're outright saying things like "wants to take care of the child they've created more than they want to do anything else" as a MINIMUM STANDARD.