"...She's really nasty to me, like she doesn't need me or something" sounds at first like the daughter is saying things that a reasonable person would consider hurtful, with the motivation that the daughter feels like she is free to insult her mother.

But "She really put me down afterward. She told me that he was ruining our relationship," sounds more like mom here interprets anything slightly negative as a personal attack. Which makes me wonder if "like she doesn't need me" is the insult, and anything short of full emotional dependence is interpreted as an attack. Which would be a Problem.