she should def. make an exit plan because there's no way out of that if the step-mom won't allow for a grey area. I've lived with people who stole cash and lied about it, and it's been complicated because I understood why and at the same time got really upset. Accusations didn't work because unless you have like video proof, it's not something easily proven in a shared household where people move around ordinarily. What eventually worked for me was talking privately with them when it happened, stating what had probably happened and that I was hurt but open to amends, and that I wasn't certain, only probable. One made amends but refuses to admit it out of shame, another years later was 'oh yeah I did that all the time', and - you gotta decide if it's the money or the relationship.

I'm not talking about like identity theft or credit card fraud where there's planned intent. But kids, teens and young adults stealing ready cash here and there is in my experience common, especially when those kids have stress/shame stuff about money and status.

And I'm absolutely not saying this woman stole from her step-mom - she clearly didn't. But her step-mom isn't being wildly off base if there's lost money and her step-daughter whom she has a strained relationship with, had access. She could've handled it a LOT better though.

It is possible to live in uncertainty - proving a theft by interrogating etc among family is really hard and can break relationships worse than living with uncertainty.