Uuuuuugh. Dump the guy, LW. And feel very sorry for the cat, who is deeply unhappy and *can't* dump him.
His idea of "true love" with the cat is ignoring its needs, letting it howl without addressing whatever is causing the distress, ignoring that aggression and drawing blood are signs of a cat who is NOT HAPPY and does NOT FEEL SAFE. He's not a cat person, he's a controlling shithead who wants both partner and cat to do whatever he wants without having to exercise any empathy or change any habits for their benefit. No one is allowed to feel safe and secure in this jerk's home - not his cat and not his partner.
That poor, poor cat. I *am* a cat person and I *have* adopted cats who were traumatized and skittish and bitey and insecure, and it is absolutely possible to set reasonable boundaries (like NOT ROUGHHOUSING WITH YOUR HANDS GODDAMMIT) and let the cat set its own boundaries (no uninvited touching or sudden movements!) and, with patience and care and attention to the cat's sense of safety and security, end up with a snuggly affectionate cat who is not afraid or aggressive anymore. But this dude isn't even trying.
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His idea of "true love" with the cat is ignoring its needs, letting it howl without addressing whatever is causing the distress, ignoring that aggression and drawing blood are signs of a cat who is NOT HAPPY and does NOT FEEL SAFE. He's not a cat person, he's a controlling shithead who wants both partner and cat to do whatever he wants without having to exercise any empathy or change any habits for their benefit. No one is allowed to feel safe and secure in this jerk's home - not his cat and not his partner.
That poor, poor cat. I *am* a cat person and I *have* adopted cats who were traumatized and skittish and bitey and insecure, and it is absolutely possible to set reasonable boundaries (like NOT ROUGHHOUSING WITH YOUR HANDS GODDAMMIT) and let the cat set its own boundaries (no uninvited touching or sudden movements!) and, with patience and care and attention to the cat's sense of safety and security, end up with a snuggly affectionate cat who is not afraid or aggressive anymore. But this dude isn't even trying.