it was the line, "Or do I tell the home care agency that we are canceling the service, but it has nothing to do with the caregiver?" that makes me think official things in this situation go through the agency.

which would mean that offering her severance if she quits might count as paying her outside the agency's realm and might have to be under the table. i'd worry that under the table money might make the agency fire her if they somehow found out.

it's hard to figure out how to protect this group of people who are doing such very hard work. the SYSTEM grrrr *shakes fist*