Needless to say, it was a very unpleasant experience. Many items that I searched for were not there, and I got vague answers about what had happened to them. My brother was outraged, words were exchanged, and he left in disgust. Was this even legal?

I confess, I am deeply curious as to what those vague answers were. As I see it, there are two possibilities: One, Sister took time off of work and spent some of her own money to take care of Mom, and that absolutely affected her retirement fund, and so - rightly or wrongly! - she decided to get her back pay, so to speak. Two, those items were gone before Mom died, to help pay for her care, because even if you're handing it all within the family it still costs.