agonyaunt | (no subject)

DEAR ABBY: I shared some information with my grandson about his mother that I shouldn't have. He repeated it to her during an argument, and now she's angry with me. I apologized, but it has not been acknowledged or accepted. Our relationship has always been tenuous and, frankly, it's not a big deal for me. She will get over it, but she's enjoying holding it over my head and being the victim.

They're moving into a beautiful house this weekend. My son told me he can't wait for me to see it, and he's sure it won't be long before I'm allowed to come out and visit. What would you do? I'm thinking of buying an olive tree. They're in style, and it would be my way if extending an olive branch. I will take it over when I know my son is there. Good idea? -- BIG MOUTH IN OKLAHOMA

DEAR BIG MOUTH: It's cute, but an olive branch and another sincere apology might be less expensive and go over better. It might even last longer than a tree in her brand-new yard that reminds her of something unpleasant.

https://www.arcamax.com/healthandspirit/lifeadvice/dearabby/s-2384154

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LW, please, when you give that olive branch to your grandson's mom, print out this letter and show it to her at the same time. She needs to know what you think of her, unfiltered.

Blech.

Wow. The lack of respect for DIL is astonishing. She'll probably burn the tree.

Having saved a few twigs in order to carve them into poppets of Ma-in-Law to stick pins into? One would be very tempted.

For the love of God, don't get her an olive tree. Those things leave olives all over the place, to be squished and stepped on and to mess up lawn mowers. And they STINK. Just...no.

That's a take I didn't expect.

Possibly I have residual olive tree trauma from my years in AZ.

Yeah, I've been in olive orchards, and they are hella messy.

Don't waste your money on an olive tree to give a branch to someone who disrespects you like that.

Wait, you're saying that LW is the one being disrespected here?

No, I misread, that'll teach me to comment before I'm awake. D'oh!

"I gossiped about someone and now they're mad at me" isn't the sympathetic letter this writer thought they were sharing.

Yeah, the person who was talking shit to their grandson about his mom is not the victim here. Like, least sympathetic audience ever or what?

This seems pointless, because of LW's own admission to what sounds like a long time not giving a damn about DIL's feelings, and clearly being terrible to her doesn't keep LW away from the other family members. It would be great if LW was sorry about upsetting her, but it doesn't seem to be the case. I agree LW should bring something alse smaller and not alive so DIL can set it on fire on a therapeutical fashion.

Wow. This just reads as: “I’m going to cut out all the incriminating details of what I actually did and hope to get into print as being clever at apologies [with all my contempt for the person I’m supposed to apologize to on full display].“

'shared' some information. Hmm-hmm? I'll take bets on that being deliberate, manipulative, and probably downright nasty.

I'm sure she only told the grandkid that Mom was the nicest, kindest, and smartest person she'd ever met.

Edited 2020-07-24 20:13 (UTC)

I needed that laugh.