How LW learned about her husband's behavior is irrelevant in the face of *his behavior*.
He was throwing his tantrum in the same house as the LW, which must be assumed to be within her earshot.
I'm the child of a ranter, and it was 100% abusive to the other people in the house even when he was "just talking to himself".
Because he was in our home. Ranting about all the ways my mom and I were terrible. And we *knew* he was in our home ranting about all the ways we were terrible.
I'm glad for your partner's sake that they've never once in 23 years overhead you in rant state, and if you two have an understanding that works for you then that's super, but I will never trust anyone with this kind of coping mechanism.
I will always advise the people in my life to treat them like they would a hot pan out if the oven: with the utmost caution and with the knowledge that this coping mechanism, by it's very nature, *will* hurt them if they come in direct contact with it.
no subject
He was throwing his tantrum in the same house as the LW, which must be assumed to be within her earshot.
I'm the child of a ranter, and it was 100% abusive to the other people in the house even when he was "just talking to himself".
Because he was in our home. Ranting about all the ways my mom and I were terrible. And we *knew* he was in our home ranting about all the ways we were terrible.
I'm glad for your partner's sake that they've never once in 23 years overhead you in rant state, and if you two have an understanding that works for you then that's super, but I will never trust anyone with this kind of coping mechanism.
I will always advise the people in my life to treat them like they would a hot pan out if the oven: with the utmost caution and with the knowledge that this coping mechanism, by it's very nature, *will* hurt them if they come in direct contact with it.