This is, interestingly, a case where I seem to differ from almost everything. I suspect that this is because I am, personally, a ranter.
I've had many arguments over the course of my (23-year) relationship where one of us huffed off in a huff, and many where I spent the next several minutes (or more) ranting to myself about my partner. TO MYSELF. I say things I would NEVER say to him, and which don't reflect underlying feelings at all, and which aren't even true -- they are (for example) the most unfair possible interpretation of events to him, or vicious name-calling. Maybe it's not the best way to off-vent anger! I'm pretty sure it's not! But it's one I know for sure I'm not alone in using.
It's not clear from the letter if the husband is telling the truth when he says he didn't know she was watching -- given that she was watching a security feed on her phone in order to hear what he was saying, I'm inclined to believe that's true. For all she knows, he's been doing this for years, and it's his way of calming himself down and allowing himself to reassess the situation.
So what I want to know is: why is this framed as him being a terrible, abusive person and not as her invading someone's privacy to find out something that they were purposefully not doing to her face to avoid hurting her?
no subject
I've had many arguments over the course of my (23-year) relationship where one of us huffed off in a huff, and many where I spent the next several minutes (or more) ranting to myself about my partner. TO MYSELF. I say things I would NEVER say to him, and which don't reflect underlying feelings at all, and which aren't even true -- they are (for example) the most unfair possible interpretation of events to him, or vicious name-calling. Maybe it's not the best way to off-vent anger! I'm pretty sure it's not! But it's one I know for sure I'm not alone in using.
It's not clear from the letter if the husband is telling the truth when he says he didn't know she was watching -- given that she was watching a security feed on her phone in order to hear what he was saying, I'm inclined to believe that's true. For all she knows, he's been doing this for years, and it's his way of calming himself down and allowing himself to reassess the situation.
So what I want to know is: why is this framed as him being a terrible, abusive person and not as her invading someone's privacy to find out something that they were purposefully not doing to her face to avoid hurting her?