Reader Wonders When It’s OK To Give Money

[conuly]

DEAR HARRIETTE: I go outside once a week to buy food and go to the pharmacy (when necessary). I don’t spend much time outside, and I’m happy to report that there aren’t a lot of people outside. What I am noticing, though, is an increase in the number of people who are begging. Many of the people look no different from me or my friends. The other ones are out there, too -- more seasoned beggars who ask for change or a dollar. I am conflicted about what I should give to these people. I know that life is getting tougher for many people, but it’s true for me, too. How can I share with some of these people and stay true to my belief that they should figure out how to take care of themselves? -- When to Give

DEAR WHEN TO GIVE: I want to advise you to soften your eyes and your attitude. Whether or not you give people money, it is important for you to gain a better understanding of what you are seeing. Through no fault of their own, millions of people are out of work. Statistics show that most Americans have only a few weeks’ worth of savings, which means that many of the more than 12 million people who recently lost their jobs are penniless already. They need food and medicines, just like you. I can only imagine that it is horrifying for many of them to find themselves outside asking for the kindness of strangers at a time when it’s scary to be outside at all.

Please look upon them with compassion. That includes the ones who have been hustling for a longer period of time. They deserve our positive energy and sense of humanity.

Who you share your resources with and how much is up to you. Consider walking with a bit of food you can give away or loose change that you can offer when you feel inspired. But also, a kind smile and acknowledgment that you are encountering another human being counts for a lot -- even if you can’t give anything more.



https://www.uexpress.com/sense-and-sensitivity/2020/4/28/0/reader-wonders-when-its-ok-to

Comments

[conuly]

I'm not saying LW should give to every panhandler they ever encounter, but their beliefs are bad and that is making them a bad person and they should feel bad. Bad, bad LW! Give more to charity! No cookies for you until you "figure out" how to be a member of a society, and also have spent some time being grateful that you've never ended up in a situation you couldn't get out of all on your own.

[jadelennox]

LW is bad and should feel bad, and Harriet is uncharacteristically not shitty.

[cereta]

Oh, for...these are not people just being lazy. A huge number of them are mentally ill, some are veterans, some are single mothers left by their partners with no child support...I don't give often, but that's because I seldom carry cash. It's certainly not because BOOTSTRAPS.

[raine]

I've noticed Harriet tends to take the more positive approach to damn near everything, and it's not always the right advice. I normally work in a historic area of Seattle, where two of the homeless shelters are, and so there's always a lot of people just hanging around with nowhere to go because well, they get kicked out of the shelters during the day and have nowhere to go. Some of them get super aggressive if you look at them for more than 2 seconds and/or refuse them cash.

[conuly]

It's okay to not give to panhandlers. LW's attitude is still infuriating.

[raine]

Not denying that the LW's attitude is annoying as f, especially since it seems they want to preach at the people instead of politely ignoring them or giving to a charity that helps the hungry and homeless. Just pointing out that Harriet's advice that giving loose change may not always be appreciated, depending on the individual receiving it.

[lilysea]

Just pointing out that Harriet's advice that giving loose change may not always be appreciated, depending on the individual receiving it.

Yeah, here in Australia the standard "ask" from a panhandler has gone up to
"Do you have $5?" or
"Do you have $10?"

I used to give to panhandlers, but I no longer do - panhandlers in my city have gotten much more aggressive and threatening lately [as of 2011, it's not a COVID thing], which makes me feel unsafe giving - as a clumsy wheelchair user with poor reaction times, I am no longer comfortable getting that physically close. [Plus, as someone who can't do paid work, it's not often that I have spare $$]

If I do have spare $$, I give to a charity instead.

Dear LW: if you don't want to see lots of panhandlers, vote for a party with a decent social safety net; and a party that will also provide more educational opportunities and more entry-level jobs. And give to effective charities. Vote for higher taxes for Amazon and more opportunities for people who have had all too few opportunities.

[cynthia1960]

It's even harder when I don't have cash to give out on me.

[naath]

I thought this was going to "is it safe to get that close" and then it went sideways.

[melissatreglia]

LW, check your attitude and donate to charity like a caring human being. I know you don't actually care, from the way you talk about the poor, but at least try to *act* like you give a shit.