I will never, ever get tired of letters that carefully elide the complaint so we can't adequately judge it. In this case, the lack of even one "demand", the fact that the therapist, after presumably seeing the demands, advised going along with them, and the phrase "walking on eggshells" leads me to think that LW's husband is definitely at fault here and LW was either at fault or at least an enabler during their son's childhood.