This, to me, is a "how about we visit you?" issue. Seriously, you in-laws aren't the ones dealing with the fallout from all of this; you and your kids are. I know it's hard to say to parents, "this is no longer a topic of discussion," but if I can do it, it can be done, and I'd say this has gone on long enough.
no subject
Secretly install a lawn. Good grief.