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Gosh, I wonder why these adult kids don't want their overbearing parents in their lives...!
1. DEAR ABBY: My son and daughter-in-law had their first child three months ago. This was the first grandchild on both sides. Her mother stayed with her for two weeks after the cesarean birth. I have no issues with that.
My issue is, my son told me I needed to leave when they and the baby came home from the hospital. Mind you, I live 6 1/2 hours away. I fought him to get at least three days when they got home. Then he said I needed to leave, but he never told his father-in-law to leave. Also, on the days I did stay, they asked me to get a motel while her parents stayed with them. I only got to go over during the day.
When I told my son my feelings were hurt, he said I was being a drama queen. I did respect everything they asked. I just want to know if I was wrong for sharing my feelings or should I have remained quiet. It has caused friction between us now. -- SECOND-CLASS IN TENNESSEE
DEAR SECOND-CLASS: This situation is not about you. It is about a brand-new baby and adjusting to parenthood. You may have come on too strong and expected too much when you said what you did. Your daughter-in-law was recovering from surgery after her first child and needed her MOTHER, not her mother-in-law. Her father was probably part of the package deal. This isn't a competition, and if you make it one, you will become even less welcome than you are now.
Link one
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2. DEAR ABBY: My 19-year-old son, who is on the spectrum but high-functioning, has left home. He's legally an adult but wouldn't allow me to teach him normal survival skills, such as balancing a checkbook, paying with a debit card, etc. He knows very little about the world; he learns from his online friends.
It has been four months, and he has now changed his phone number and won't call, email or text. He moved across the country to live with an online friend. I'm very concerned about him. What should I do? I don't email him often, but when I do, I just tell him I love him, and I never say anything negative. -- LOST IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR LOST: Four months, you say? Assuming you have his current address, perhaps it is time for you -- and his other parent, if he or she is in the picture -- to pay the young man a visit to see how he's doing. Because he won't respond to phone calls, emails or texts, I don't think you have a choice other than that.
Link two
My issue is, my son told me I needed to leave when they and the baby came home from the hospital. Mind you, I live 6 1/2 hours away. I fought him to get at least three days when they got home. Then he said I needed to leave, but he never told his father-in-law to leave. Also, on the days I did stay, they asked me to get a motel while her parents stayed with them. I only got to go over during the day.
When I told my son my feelings were hurt, he said I was being a drama queen. I did respect everything they asked. I just want to know if I was wrong for sharing my feelings or should I have remained quiet. It has caused friction between us now. -- SECOND-CLASS IN TENNESSEE
DEAR SECOND-CLASS: This situation is not about you. It is about a brand-new baby and adjusting to parenthood. You may have come on too strong and expected too much when you said what you did. Your daughter-in-law was recovering from surgery after her first child and needed her MOTHER, not her mother-in-law. Her father was probably part of the package deal. This isn't a competition, and if you make it one, you will become even less welcome than you are now.
Link one
2. DEAR ABBY: My 19-year-old son, who is on the spectrum but high-functioning, has left home. He's legally an adult but wouldn't allow me to teach him normal survival skills, such as balancing a checkbook, paying with a debit card, etc. He knows very little about the world; he learns from his online friends.
It has been four months, and he has now changed his phone number and won't call, email or text. He moved across the country to live with an online friend. I'm very concerned about him. What should I do? I don't email him often, but when I do, I just tell him I love him, and I never say anything negative. -- LOST IN CALIFORNIA
DEAR LOST: Four months, you say? Assuming you have his current address, perhaps it is time for you -- and his other parent, if he or she is in the picture -- to pay the young man a visit to see how he's doing. Because he won't respond to phone calls, emails or texts, I don't think you have a choice other than that.
Link two