With that out of the way, LW1 needs to insist on joint parenting classes and couples counseling - it's either that or a divorce attorney. And in the meantime, if they do not agree on a discipline practice, neither of them does it.
2. See, this right here is why I try not to use the A word for culturally normative parenting practices. (Unless, of course, the other person says it first.) It just never brings you anywhere good.
Was LW2's father abusive? You could certainly make that case, and another child growing up in that same situation might well label it that way! I wouldn't argue with them if they did.
But LW2 does not think it was abusive, and even if it was, Dad has apologized for his behavior and his children have forgiven him. It is not any of Friend's business.
With that said, I do think LW2 could benefit from doing some research on spanking. Among other things, it seems to me that it is very possible that they and their siblings were not "demons", they were normal children who acted out because of the "scary" environment of their home. I don't say this because I think LW2 needs to hate their dad or refuse to forgive him or be sad about their childhood - I say this because they might have kids themself and really ought to have a more nuanced and updated perspective on discipline.
(I also think that once your child has jumped through a glass coffee table once you get a normal non-glass coffee table until they're grown. But then, who expects them to do it twice!?)
no subject
With that out of the way, LW1 needs to insist on joint parenting classes and couples counseling - it's either that or a divorce attorney. And in the meantime, if they do not agree on a discipline practice, neither of them does it.
2. See, this right here is why I try not to use the A word for culturally normative parenting practices. (Unless, of course, the other person says it first.) It just never brings you anywhere good.
Was LW2's father abusive? You could certainly make that case, and another child growing up in that same situation might well label it that way! I wouldn't argue with them if they did.
But LW2 does not think it was abusive, and even if it was, Dad has apologized for his behavior and his children have forgiven him. It is not any of Friend's business.
With that said, I do think LW2 could benefit from doing some research on spanking. Among other things, it seems to me that it is very possible that they and their siblings were not "demons", they were normal children who acted out because of the "scary" environment of their home. I don't say this because I think LW2 needs to hate their dad or refuse to forgive him or be sad about their childhood - I say this because they might have kids themself and really ought to have a more nuanced and updated perspective on discipline.
(I also think that once your child has jumped through a glass coffee table once you get a normal non-glass coffee table until they're grown. But then, who expects them to do it twice!?)