This strikes me as such an important point. She hasn't said, "You're not welcome here." She's said, "We have other plans that day, pick a different day." Sure, he had a plan, but you don't get to unilaterally plan other adults' day. If he wanted to do that with this person he should have stuck around when she was his minor child, over whom the law if not kindness or common decency gives a great deal of leeway for dictation of what they must endure and when they must endure it. Too late now.