Given the careful gender-neutral words regarding the adults in this story I think it's better than the usual odds that LW and/or partner are visibly and publicly LGBTQ+ in a way that Other Parent can't ignore... which is a real problem given the specific question being asked.
Here's the thing. Short of getting a restraining order, LW cannot actually forbid their son's other parent from cutting his hair. And if they did, that... might not mean much. I mean, it's a legal fiction, not a warrior drone that follows the child around. The other parent might well decide to do it anyway and dare LW to follow through with the law.
And that's assuming that LW could get such a restraining order in the first place. Sure, this behavior is problematic and possibly abusive... but it's not exactly actionable, is it? Not really the sort of thing the courts can bring themselves to care about too much... and if LW and new partner are in some LGBTQ+ relationship then even going to court can turn into a real shitshow real fast.
And if LW cannot affect Other Parent's behavior then the first grader really cannot. It is not okay to put this on him. If you tell him to "try his best to stand up for himself and let them know when he doesn’t want his hair cut" then what he's going to hear is that it's his fault if his parent goes against his wishes.
It's better to say "Look, I think this is wrong too, but I can't actually force Other Parent to stop, even though it's really bad. I'll try talking to them again, but they think they're right and I'm wrong."
no subject
Here's the thing. Short of getting a restraining order, LW cannot actually forbid their son's other parent from cutting his hair. And if they did, that... might not mean much. I mean, it's a legal fiction, not a warrior drone that follows the child around. The other parent might well decide to do it anyway and dare LW to follow through with the law.
And that's assuming that LW could get such a restraining order in the first place. Sure, this behavior is problematic and possibly abusive... but it's not exactly actionable, is it? Not really the sort of thing the courts can bring themselves to care about too much... and if LW and new partner are in some LGBTQ+ relationship then even going to court can turn into a real shitshow real fast.
And if LW cannot affect Other Parent's behavior then the first grader really cannot. It is not okay to put this on him. If you tell him to "try his best to stand up for himself and let them know when he doesn’t want his hair cut" then what he's going to hear is that it's his fault if his parent goes against his wishes.
It's better to say "Look, I think this is wrong too, but I can't actually force Other Parent to stop, even though it's really bad. I'll try talking to them again, but they think they're right and I'm wrong."