My turn: the only bed linens that should be tucked under are the layers that go beneath the sleeper: the mattress cover and the fitted sheet. I do not care to sleep in an envelope.

(Bedtime in a hotel begins with dismantling the housekeepers’ careful handiwork (and discarding most of the bed coverings and pillows, since the hotel bed presentations I’ve encountered, even in the dead of summer, usually seem to have been anticipating the arrival of Queen Elizabeth during a January blizzard.) One blanket and one sheet, to be adjusted at will, since my thermoregulation sucks; one pillow for under my head; one to elevate my legs; one as a platform for my plush traveling companions. All else is excess.)