he kept twisting it that I was mad at him for wanting butter on his mashed potatoes. I insisted on counseling, and that’s what he kept telling the therapist. She told us therapy wouldn’t work if he was going to stonewall like that. He laughed about it on the way home, saying he showed her.

He laughed because he thought he pulled one over on the therapist? Good for you, LW, that you got out when you did. Don't even think about returning to him. He only wants his emotional punching bag back.