Even with me having a HIGH libido, it took me 4 months to recover enough from childbirth/episotomy to have penetrative sex without pain.
(I also have some medical trauma from having requested “no episiotomy” in writing and getting one routinely performed anyway — the whole pregnancy was a mess, with life-threatening issues twice, and the misery of hyperemesis gravidarum until delivery, and my OB was, in retrospect, pretty awful. This was 30 years ago, I really would have benefited from online parents’ groups if I’d had access to them!)
First, the LW is not obliged to “try” until she feels ready. Doctors usually issue the all-clear for sex after 6 weeks, but that doesn’t mean it will be ENJOYABLE.
A pelvic-floor physical therapist can check for any issues and provide some reassurance, but it sounds like anxiety is a big factor here.
This is sooooo frequently an issue for people with vulvas who are trying to get back on their feet sexually after a birth!
no subject
(I also have some medical trauma from having requested “no episiotomy” in writing and getting one routinely performed anyway — the whole pregnancy was a mess, with life-threatening issues twice, and the misery of hyperemesis gravidarum until delivery, and my OB was, in retrospect, pretty awful. This was 30 years ago, I really would have benefited from online parents’ groups if I’d had access to them!)
First, the LW is not obliged to “try” until she feels ready. Doctors usually issue the all-clear for sex after 6 weeks, but that doesn’t mean it will be ENJOYABLE.
A pelvic-floor physical therapist can check for any issues and provide some reassurance, but it sounds like anxiety is a big factor here.
This is sooooo frequently an issue for people with vulvas who are trying to get back on their feet sexually after a birth!