OK I get it. Husband wants to do his bit. Compromise might be (and only if the wife is interested) in meeting said husband part way. Say drop him off/pick him up at a terminal hub. It is a step closer to what he wants and doesn't take the full 2 hrs one way.

I agree tho that it sounds like he wants to have 4 hrs without family every day.

mass transit realllllly sucks most places. And even sucks in places it shouldn't suck (looking at you Baltimore with your terrible system to get to the DC area which is practically next door.) He either needs to find a compromise or he needs to drive half time to help out around home more.