agonyaunt | (no subject)

DEAR ABBY: Several years ago, my parents betrayed my son and me. They took in and supported my ex-husband, who walked out on us for a coworker he was cheating with. My son and I lost our home, our car and the life we knew without support from any family. My son was still in high school, and it was a dark time in both of our lives.

My parents are both older and have been diagnosed with life-threatening conditions. They are now reaching out to us. To say the least, I am apprehensive. Having to go through what I did with only the support of my friends and son made me stronger, and I (literally and figuratively) have moved on.

I don't know if I should reconsider a relationship with my parents. Losing my father's support was harder than losing my husband, and I don't want to experience that pain again. Can you advise? -- BURNED IN TENNESSEE

DEAR BURNED: You did not desert your parents; your parents deserted you when you needed them most. To you and your son's credit, you moved forward and created a chosen family from the people who showed they cared about you.

Your parents chose your husband and his lady friend. Have they ever apologized or tried to make amends? You stated that you have "literally and figuratively" moved on. If your parents haven't done that, my advice would be for you to continue moving on.

https://www.uexpress.com/life/dearabby/2022/04/24

Threaded | Flat

I gotta ask - are the parents reaching out because they want LW's love and forgiveness, or are they reaching out because they've realized their daughter is more likely to care for them than her ex is?

I'm trying to think of a situation where I would support my kid's ex-spouse over my kid and minor grandkid. The only ones I can think of are where my kid is acting so horribly that I should be trying to get grandkid away from them too, and in that case I certainly wouldn't be reaching out to them if I had a life-threatening condition!

There's a whole series of books of missing backstory here.