Basically, all of this, yes. I have to admit, as much as spouse and I joke about the small fanperson getting to a stage where she asks us to drop her off three blocks from school, I'm nervous about her (not-too-far-away) tweens. She's a sensitive kid, and has already had some serious clique issues and issues with peers thinking she's "weird." We've basically taken to trying to persuade her that "weird" means "creative and smart and interesting" (fortunately, we have many, many adults who reinforce that with her, because, well, we're weird and have weird friends ;). But we also recognize that it's going to take some cognitive and emotional development for that lesson to stick.

Which is just to say: yes, you have to tailor things to the kid.