True, but it's the kind of thing where I can see husband thinking it's just the obvious corollary of stuff she agrees with, and besides neither of them would cheat so it's just rubber stamp and no big deal. And the kind of thing where he might have mentioned it before and she didn't take note because she didn't care either way - until it was her pregnancy and marriage and she did.

I mean chances are Carolyn's right and he's just a lying cheating POS who thinks everyone is as dishonest as he is. But he could just be the sort of smug, rigid, rationality-obsessed asshole you describe - I have known men and women of the type - and they can make fine, loyal spouses for someone who likes that sort of thing, if they figure out that part about other people's inner lives, anyway. I don't think LW is someone who likes that sort of thing, though, and husband probably should work on the 'other people' part some more.