Like, you don't just lose your sex drive over the one comment, no matter how pointed and profoundly it hurt.
I don't know, I can see it.
Content note: discussion of every kind of self-loathing related to bodies. Also implied discussion of my own sex life.
** space **
I fight so much internalized body shame (the smells and bodily fluids of an AFAB body; the physical features of a body that doesn't conform to western cosmetic standards; self fat-shame; self chronic illness and disability shame; general internalized misogyny) that -- even though my partner has never shown any hint of sharing a single iota of my distaste for my body! -- fighting it off is a constant, ongoing, active process. I am pretty sure if I'd ever had the vibe that my partner thought I smelled dirty, I'd go into an anxious depression spiral that absolutely could kill my sex drive (barring a lot of therapy). So that really might be all it took.
no subject
I don't know, I can see it.
Content note: discussion of every kind of self-loathing related to bodies. Also implied discussion of my own sex life.
** space **
I fight so much internalized body shame (the smells and bodily fluids of an AFAB body; the physical features of a body that doesn't conform to western cosmetic standards; self fat-shame; self chronic illness and disability shame; general internalized misogyny) that -- even though my partner has never shown any hint of sharing a single iota of my distaste for my body! -- fighting it off is a constant, ongoing, active process. I am pretty sure if I'd ever had the vibe that my partner thought I smelled dirty, I'd go into an anxious depression spiral that absolutely could kill my sex drive (barring a lot of therapy). So that really might be all it took.