There are two issues here, and Care & Feeding only addresses one of them. The OP says they are worried about their kids, and C&F says the kids will be fine. Sure. It looks like the OP is ALSO worried about their own ability to cope, because their old anxieties are getting triggered. This is the kind of thing that can be worth working past, without being easy to work past. It certainly isn't the kind of thing that disappears if you just ignore it.