My now-husband was a work-in-progress, and certainly made some comments early in our relationship that I ended up shutting down hard. They were a product of our very conservative, very Evangelical upbringing, and I was further down the road of "yeah, no" than he was at the time. Looking back, I probably would have told my younger self to DTMFA. These days, he might be further left-leaning than I am, and is an atheist.

So, people can learn and grow, but the question of whether you want a partner or a project is accurate. You have to be willing to call out some of those problematic comments, and not back down, and then you have to live through the fights. And there were some!