Your phrasing shows how deeply fucked up that attitude is. And yes, I really think you're right about the core thoughts behind this. LW uses the word "save" which has all kinds of virtue signaling, but the husband thinks of this in a very transactional way. Truly, those Legos are not a gift at all! The parents are actually another layer of retail making the kids buy the toy. Now, if the parents put a markup on the price they paid at the store for the kids to pay, that would be even more fucked up.

I really wish the judge had used your formulation instead of "forced to earn their toys". He should have been hella blunt and said, "Your capitalist transactional deal with your children gives them such a damaged idea of what a gift is and does not teach them any life skills about mutual aid. After the pandemic ends, your children will not be able to function well in a post-capitalist society." But, of course, he'll never come right out and say such horrible commie anarchist stuff because the column is in the NY Times!