I keep telling her it’ll get done, but then she becomes exasperated with me. “Who’s going to do it?” she says.

Oh, God, this is SUCH a sore point for me. I've been dealing with people like this my whole life. I seriously had to fight to get through to my spouse that the dishes weren't just magically getting done; I was doing them two days after the "tomorrow" he'd said he'd do them. It wasn't intentional. His parents were compulsive dish-washers (seriously, never put down a half-empty glass in their house; it will be washed before you get back from the bathroom). Don't get me wrong: he's gotten a lot better. But it took work. LW needs a clue-by-four.