ashbet: (Default)
ashbet ([personal profile] ashbet) wrote in [community profile] agonyaunt 2020-02-19 11:55 am (UTC)

As Captain Awkward says, sometimes the cheapest way to pay for something is with money.

While I agree with all of you that “to help HER” is bad framing, and the husband SHOULD make changes, I also think that if they can afford it, getting a cleaning service or childcare or cooking assistance might make a material difference in everyone’s exhaustion and irritability.

His wife is coming home and working the “second shift” — taking over some of that burden by outsourcing, AND by the husband taking over some of those tasks, is a good way to ease stress on the marriage and its inhabitants.

(Obviously, this advice only works for people who can afford it, but two lawyers have a decent likelihood of being able to do so.)

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