it doesn't sound like it's just grief from losing her mother motivating Lisa's need to withhold any empathy from the writer's problems with her mother, but big pre-existing narcissism and need to control issues, probably with a good heaping of abusiveness, and she's using her loss to make her needs prime, and shut down the writer's ability to express her pain. That she could give little patience to a girlfriend who was thrown out of the house, and this early in the relationship--big red flag. If that didn't cut through her grief to recognize other people exist who have been abused by living mothers, nothing will. Frankly, I would be surprised if Lisa were willing to go to therapy and recognize she's got a big problem. Lisa isn't going to change if the writer hasn't gotten through to her already, and her methods to silence the writer will escalate. The writer needs to walk full speed away. Lisa is bad news.