LW, I think you can safely say that you and Ellen used to be friends. I don't see any way she's coming back from this one. Her son's behaviour is so out of line, and his mother is enabling him in the worst way.

I feel awful for the LW and her daughter, but I also feel awful for Ryan. He's 12 years old. His mother is supposed to be teaching him not to engage in harmful behaviour and preventing him from developing toxic habits and ways of thought, not excusing his inappropriate actions and protecting him from the consequences.