I tend to look at the worst possibe scenarios in this situation.
Worst case scenario if she stays: She ends up another of those ex-wives with the kids who can be dropped from the narrative he makes of his life at a moment's notice. And she's alone - again - but now with kids.
Worst case scenario if she leaves: She ends up alone (and lonely, from the sound of it "all I've ever wanted is to meet someone to build a life with" she's not someone who could be happy just in and of herself, she needs a man to validate her).
There's also the possibillity that she finds out he has yet another family and she's the bit on the side. Not sure whether she'd consider this worse or better than becoming an ex-with-kids by him.
Mind you, I'm also of the "a man who will lie to his wife, will lie to his mistress" mindset. I'm also not convinced that the kind of man who would hide ex-wives and children is the kind of man who actually sees himself as having any responsibility to pay for child support, let alone college.
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Worst case scenario if she stays:
She ends up another of those ex-wives with the kids who can be dropped from the narrative he makes of his life at a moment's notice. And she's alone - again - but now with kids.
Worst case scenario if she leaves:
She ends up alone (and lonely, from the sound of it "all I've ever wanted is to meet someone to build a life with" she's not someone who could be happy just in and of herself, she needs a man to validate her).
There's also the possibillity that she finds out he has yet another family and she's the bit on the side. Not sure whether she'd consider this worse or better than becoming an ex-with-kids by him.
Mind you, I'm also of the "a man who will lie to his wife, will lie to his mistress" mindset. I'm also not convinced that the kind of man who would hide ex-wives and children is the kind of man who actually sees himself as having any responsibility to pay for child support, let alone college.