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DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband is a control freak. Everything I say and do, he seems to want to modify, starting with food. He likes to tell me exactly what I should eat and when, and he always has a story about why he makes those suggestions. I get that he is into nutrition, but I want to eat in peace. I am an adult, and I do not need him to monitor my every bite.
Similarly, he tries to monitor all of my activities. I am a stay-at-home mom. He has a job. While he is at work, he is constantly calling me or texting me to see what I am doing. It is annoying. I am fine. I do not need him to monitor everything. How can I get him to stop? -- Loosen Your Grasp
DEAR LOOSEN YOUR GRASP: Talk to your husband. Remind him that you are an adult and are capable of taking care of yourself. Ask him to stop trying to control your every move. Tell him that it is suffocating. Yes, you need to say it out loud. Point out that your job is to take care of your family at home, just as his is to care for your family through his work. Remind him that you are capable of handling the household duties and that you will reach out to him if you need help.
To the best of your ability, ignore him when he starts to go through a litany of things that you should do. Let him talk, but don't feel like you have to do everything he says. If he becomes agitated or even violent when you do not comply, you may need to seek shelter. Just try pushing back for now, and see what balance you can strike together.
https://www.arcamax.com/healthandspirit/lifeadvice/senseandsensitivity/s-2731687
Similarly, he tries to monitor all of my activities. I am a stay-at-home mom. He has a job. While he is at work, he is constantly calling me or texting me to see what I am doing. It is annoying. I am fine. I do not need him to monitor everything. How can I get him to stop? -- Loosen Your Grasp
DEAR LOOSEN YOUR GRASP: Talk to your husband. Remind him that you are an adult and are capable of taking care of yourself. Ask him to stop trying to control your every move. Tell him that it is suffocating. Yes, you need to say it out loud. Point out that your job is to take care of your family at home, just as his is to care for your family through his work. Remind him that you are capable of handling the household duties and that you will reach out to him if you need help.
To the best of your ability, ignore him when he starts to go through a litany of things that you should do. Let him talk, but don't feel like you have to do everything he says. If he becomes agitated or even violent when you do not comply, you may need to seek shelter. Just try pushing back for now, and see what balance you can strike together.
https://www.arcamax.com/healthandspirit/lifeadvice/senseandsensitivity/s-2731687