Agreed. On one hand, it shouldn’t be the girlfriend’s responsibility to fix her boyfriend’s family. On the other, if she is refusing requests for help because of the gender imbalance, then claiming she is doing so because of guest status is, in my opinion, a confusing misdirection.

LW’s son needs to take a more active role, but it’s unclear how much he knows about the dynamic between his mother and girlfriend. LW doesn’t even mention talking to him, which I find a glaring omission.